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I Accept that I Am Now a Size 10!


After months of denial, I have finally accepted the fact that I am no longer a size 8.   In my acceptance, I did the unthinkable, but probably in hindsight the right thing, I removed most (there are just some pieces I couldn’t let go of) of  the size 8’s (especially the pants) that were taking up space in my closet and donated them.  Keeping them to serve as an incentive was of no use because after months of watching my calorie intake via myfitnesspal, saying no to cocktails, zumba, and 30 minute stints on the treadmill, my weight has  flatlined at 155 lbs.

My closet looks a little neater and all of the size 10’s, are now front row and center where they belong.  Of course, I will keep up the dieting and exercise for maintenance and to tone my incredibly expanding ass and arms, but I am so over with fretting about why my body was refusing to return to a size 8.

For those of you who are undergoing similar “issues” know that you are not alone.  I was surprised to read that popular blogger Vahni of Grit & Glamour is also experiencing the same thing.  She revealed this in her January 11th post and wrote these words of encouragement.

“Accept yourself as you are right now… Just remember there are people with ailments, disabilities, or who’ve had accidents that would be grateful for a functioning body like yours. Acceptance is crucial to self-love. This is a tough one, but to move forward, you have to nip appearance-induced depression and self-loathing in the bud. Accepting yourself doesn’t mean you have to love the way you look—it just means that you aren’t beating yourself up about it. But if you don’t like how you look and feel right now, realize that it’s not going to change unless YOU change.” Vahni of Grit & Glamour

Here in Connecticut, writer/poet Tracy Caldwell created and will present The Thick Chronicles: A Body Image Story On January 28 and 29th at Trinity-On-Main, 69 Main Street, New Britain, CT.  The Thick Chronicles, is a collection of poems, skits and first person accounts of people’s love/hate relationship with their bodies told through poignant and humorous stories.

 “The Thick Chronicles is a movement, a call to arms to gear ourselves up to fight back against body image diseases that can eventually lead to death. The person who is a size 0 and doesn’t love their body is the same as the person who’s a size 24 and doesn’t love their body. It’s more important to have self-worth than it is to have an hour glass figure. We want people to be inspired by these true stories and know you are not alone. It is okay to feel beautiful in the skin you are in, because beauty is in the eye of the beholder. We do not have to let one opinion of beauty run our lives.” Tracy Caldwell

Support the event and/or join the Thick Chronicles movement by following via Tumblr.  Other body image blogs for support and encouragement that you can check out include: Weightless and ThickDumplingSkin.

From my now, very edited closet, I wore this outfit to my cousin’s birthday get together on Saturday.  It was a bit brisk on Saturday so I added my, thank God it still fits, faux leather vest.  Please visit my Facebook page to see the outfit in action.

I am wearing:

Black, sheer t-shirt with gold sequined sleeves bought from Marshalls.

Leopard-print pencil skirt (yes, I decided the print was leopard) bought from Macys last seen here.  Similar available here.

Photos by: Robert Cooper

About Natasha Samuels

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  1. A size 10 that look very good you have it all.

  2. Thank you for sharing this post! I think you are beautiful and confident which adds to your radiance. I have struggled with my image most of my life and have only begun to be comfortable in the past 3-5 years when I discovered how to express myself through fashion <3

    • Hi Kaitlyn,
      Thanks for stopping by my blog and leaving your comment. I am humbled. On another note, I am so looking forward in joining everyone for the next #BlogTrends chat on Twitter. Really great info!

  3. My ass is growing! Can you flipping believe I had to toss three jeans recently? Not because I have been wearing them consistently and comfortably for the past ten years but because for the life of me I could not get in them anymore! The one that did go past the hip, could not meet at the front. The one that did meet……..wow…..my legs are still getting the circulation back!

    At age forty I am finally filling out the rear…….Kinda wish that would have gone up to my barely-out-of-training-bra chest though. Come on. I would settle for even 36B so I can push some girls up under my neck too!……….. But then buying bras is an expense I can do without.

    Bottom line (no pun intended) we just gotta work with what we got, make the best of it and accept that not everything that is trendy is necessarily fashionable for us as we are. Find what works and work it.
    A we seh Fashion ova Style.

    • I nearly fell out my chair when I read this. It must be a Sammy girl thing. Our metabolism slowed at the same time. As a budget blogger, my collection of clothes is one of my assets. Growing out of them is not cool. It’s not like I have a super clothes budget or sponsors to replace them. Get ready to see some serious remixing of what I have left.

  4. I love that leopard print skirt girl! Hot, hot! 🙂 I love your energy and confidence! You embody what I truly believe, that fashion is for EVERYONE no matter what your size! You go girl! 🙂

    • Somewhere, someone believes that fashion is for the slim and young. I am so happy to see that there are so many curvy bloggers out there. Honestly seeing how wonderfully stylish and confident these women are helped me to accept the person I am right now.

  5. Accepting my no-longer-a-size-six-ass right along with you! It’s not easy, but it’s better. Stepping up the gym time, too, but for now, the skinny pants are at the back of my closet as well.

    Thanks for the shout, my dear. WE CAN DO THIS! The right way!

    • Hi Vahni,
      Yes, we certainly can. First of all, I am so humbled to know that you read my blog. *blushes*

      For anyone reading this, I just want to add that starvation diets don’t work either. Your body needs enough calories in order to burn calories. (Disclosure: I am not a Doctor or one skilled in nutrition). I actually went to see a Nutritionist a few months ago. She recommended that I stick with 1600 calories per day. She also introduced me to myfitnesspal which used my age and height to calculate that I needed to eat MINIMUM 1200 calories per day. I read it wrong and thought that I had to keep it at 1200. So of course, everyday I kept my calories UNDER 1200. Wrong! When I calculate my calories now, there is a little message that shows up and says “you aren’t getting enough calories if you continue to eat like this you will lose x amount of weight in 5 weeks.” Lesson learned.

  6. Lovely post Cuz! I love that you included the importance of exercise and a health diet in your blog. I do understand that as we get older it becomes harder to keep the weight off but it is important to exercise and eat healthy and not just sit around a gain the weight. You look lovely as usual.

  7. First of all, thank you so much for the comments on my blog–yay! Sorry that wasn’t working for you before.

    Second, you are a gorgeous girl and I LOVE this post so much, especially the excerpts that you added from the other blog. It is very important to love your body and appreciate what you have. The other blogger is right, there are some people that would just be happy with two working legs. That really puts things into perspective.

    At any size, you are a lovely woman and I hope you appreciate all that you are. Thank you for sharing this post. It is really inspirational.

    • Awwww, thanks Robin. “Inspirational” that’s the second time I heard that regarding this post (one on Facebook). I think I am going to try to be more open about things that I am struggling with and to let everyone know how I am dealing with it going forward.